Lessons From My Grandson - Part 1

Carter Reece Phillips 2008

It was the fall of 2008. I had just picked up my grandson, Carter, from Northeast School where he was in the first grade. We were waiting in line to leave the school parking lot when he looked over at me and said, "Pop Pop, do you know what I am going to be when I grow up?" I replied, "No Carter, I don't know." He looked at me and said proudly, "I am going to be a preacher like you." Well, what do you say to that? I thought for a second and said, "If that is what God calls you to be, I will be so very proud of you."

As we turned onto the main road, I thought that part of the conversation was finished. It wasn't! Carter spoke up again and said, "Yep, I am going to be a preacher....... (long pause) OR a rodeo clown!" I almost lost it right then. I turned to him and said, "Well, I know some preachers who are clowns and some clowns who can preach, but whatever God calls you to be, I will still be very proud of you." As I think back on that day, I realize that God places before us endless opportunities and unbelievable avenues to a life that is full and amazing. Carter knew that. I still struggle with it.

Over the years, I have found that the Lord has used Carter Reece Phillips to teach me some of the most valuable lessons I have ever learned. It didn't take him long to get started. On the day he was born, I had taken my daughter, Mary, to her regular appointment with the obstetrician. I was not supposed to be the one to take her that day. Her mom usually did that, but she had to work.

However, it was no accident that I was the one who went with her. This was made even more apparent when Mary came out of the doctor's office, told me she was in labor, and we headed next door to the hospital in Crossville.

It was 2001, and I had spent much of the past 7 years in bed recuperating from 5 failed surgeries on my spine and a tumor on my pituitary gland in my brain. The "Dark Nights" were getting darker and darker. I was more than ready to give up. To tell the truth, most days I just wanted to die and be released from the physical and emotional pain I was in (see my last blog "Poppy, I Don't Want You to Go" for insight on why giving up is never an option).

From early on that September 5th day, I lay in the waiting room waiting for our first grandchild to be born. To be honest, I was more concerned with how bad I was hurting and how long I had been waiting than I was about this new addition to our family. For "some reason," at about 3:05 pm, I got up and went to "stretch my legs."

Suddenly, I found myself right outside my daughter's room. I heard a cry and a nurse came out of the room to get something from across the hall. As she turned to go back in the room, she asked if I would like to see my new grandson. Now, I am as squeamish as they come. Plus, I thought I would pass out. I started to say no, but yet again for "some reason," I said yes. The nurse took my arm and led me into the room.

To make a long story short, Carter Reece Phillips entered the world at 3:09 pm, and the first person to hold him was not momma or daddy or grandma, but ME! The nurse turned around and placed him in my arms. Only God could have made things work out that way.

I stood in the middle of that room trembling. Part of it was being afraid I would drop him, but mostly it was from seeing this precious gift from God. For that moment in time, there was no pain, time stood still, the cares of this world ceased to exist, and there was noone else in the entire world but me and my grandson. It was (and is) a bonding that only God could forge. I will never forget that moment or the way the Lord led me into that hallway and then into that room so I could be the first to hold him. The Lord had orchestrated that whole day to infuse bright light into my darkness, and for 13 years now, God has used Carter to continue to dispel the darkness.

Six days later, I took Carter and my daughter to his first doctor's appointment. As I held him in the waiting room, all I could think about was whether he was ok. His appointment was at 9:00 am. I noticed that the TV in the waiting area was showing a Breaking News Alert, but sitting there holding my grandson was all I cared about. He finally got called back. His checkup was excellent. I left relieved and thankful to God for His blessings.

Oh, by the way, in case you haven't figured it out, the Breaking News Alert was about planes flying into the World Trade Center. Carter's appointment was September 11, 2001. Our country was under attack, yet all I cared about was the health of my grandson. In only six days, the Lord had used Carter to profoundly change his Pop Pop. And that was only the beginning.

I have mentioned this before in my blogs, but it bears repeating: Other than my wife, Karen, Carter is the best friend I have ever had in my life. He is not perfect. But those of you who have grandchildren can testify that they are about as close as you can get to perfect. And I do get upset with him sometimes. I have even spanked him "ONCE" in 13 years! He has forgotten it, but I still carry the scars around in me.

I know what you are probably thinking right now. "Tony, I understand your love for your grandson. But what does this have to do with me and my circumstances?" Well, if you are struggling in your own "Dark Nights," you probably could not help but smile or chuckle as you read the first part of this blog. Let me ask you this - When was the last time you remember doing that? See, God has blessed your life through Carter and many of you have never met him. I want to share with you some other lessons I have learned. I bet they will bless you as well. They will definitely open your eyes and heart to the dreams and possibilities that are all around us.

Carter is a dreamer. He is curious about everything. He sees the world much differently than you or I. His insights can take your breath away. One evening I was in my study working on a sermon. He was 3 years old. He stood by the recliner and asked, "Whatcha doin' Pop Pop. You working on a sermon?" I said, "Yes I am." He continued, "A sermon about God?" I smiled and told him, "Why yes, it is a sermon about God. How did you know?" Then he proceeded to get my total attention by saying, "You know Pop Pop, I saw God!!" Whoa! What!! How do I proceed with this conversation? Should I just let it go? Change the subject? No, I asked the obvious question, "Carter when did you see God?"

He looked at me and said, "When I was in my momma's belly, I saw God." I was speechless. I quickly pondered the theological questions that came to my mind. I considered the fact that he was only 3 and did not know what he was saying. Then, I started to do what I always do when these kind of issues came up -- that is, I decided to call to my wife and have her handle it. But before I could do it, Carter climbed in my lap, looked me right in the eye, and asked, "You do believe me don't you Pop Pop?" At that point, there was no doubt in my mind that he had seen God.

After he told me, he hopped out of my lap and ran out of the room looking for another adventure to explore. I was left with his words seared into my brain. Then several Scriptures came rushing into my mind:

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. (Matthew 5:5 (ESV)

At that time Jesus declared, “I thank you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that you have hidden these things from the wise and understanding and revealed them to little children; (Matthew 11:25 (ESV)

but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 19:14 (ESV)

Have you ever noticed that when you talk to a child about God, their eyes light up? Have you ever in your life heard a young child say that he/she doesn't believe there is a God? As adults, we may know that the Scriptures say, “...with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26 (ESV), but most of the time we don't believe that. Our words and actions actually reflect the exact opposite. However, ask a child about what is possible with God. EVERYTHING! No doubt at all! Their eyes sparkle as they talk about all that God can do.

You may be startled to learn that YOU and I used to be just like Carter. It was a shock to me when I thought about it. How did I get from that child-like faith to the negative, flimsy, hit-or-miss faith that I find in myself today? People will say that it is only natural for that to happen. It is part of growing up. There comes a time when we have to put away childish things.

Let me get this straight --- we start out with unquestioned belief in God, absolute trust in Him at all times, we see Him all around us (even though most adults cannot), we love Him with all of our heart, we can't shut up when we talk about Him, and our prayers actually come from our heart and we expectantly believe that God not only hears but answers them. 

So, growing up and losing all that is a GOOD thing? Does it make sense to you that we should be glad that those "childish" things are gone? When you read the New Testament, Jesus makes it very clear. If we desire to know him, we must come to Him as a child! We are, to be sure, to grow in our knowledge of Him and strive to be more like Him, but we are never supposed to lose that child-like wonder and awe that He gave to us before we were born.

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. (Psalm 139:13-16 (ESV)

The history of the world is filled with innumerable illegitimate parents, but in all of that time, there has never been an illegitimate child. God knew each of us before we were conceived. He literally knit us together in our mother's womb. He sees our unformed bodies. He knows the time of our birth and He knows every single day of our lives before we have taken our first breath. Don't believe me? Ask Carter? Ask your children? Grandchildren?

You see, a God who has been so intimately involved in your entire existence is not going to abandon you when times get tough. You were (and are) "fearfully and wonderfully made." The creation that is you was no accident. It was not some random event. You were created out of Divine love by a Heavenly Father who has not and will not ever let you down. 

Many people struggle with the whole idea of God being our Father. My friend, Alice Dyer, explained it this way. "Tony, you have two children, right. Imagine if one of them ran off, stayed away for a long time, and got into all kinds of trouble. One day, the police show up at your door with them and they ask you if this is your child, what will you tell them?" I said, "I would say yes officer that is my child." Alice continued, "See, no matter where they go or what they do, it does not change the fact that they are your child. God is the same way. Even though we may feel as though we have let God down by our actions, it does not change the fact that He is our Father and we are His child." 

Continued in "Lessons From My Grandson" - Part 2. Click here to go to Part 2 
http://jesusishopeinthedarkestnight.blogspot.com/2014/10/lessons-from-my-grandson-part-2.html